A couple of hours has past now. My phone vibrates, a text message from you know who appears.
The last sentence read, "I hope that one day, you can really see that."
Right now I can't respond. I don't want to fall back into the same routine. I read it again. I’m starting to doubt my decisions. Maybe this time the light will go on...maybe this time she will fully commit. She just needs to know how much I love her. She needs to know that I can be that rock she can lean on through good and bad times. Wait, she has had two years to realize what we can be. Someone once said that the definition of stupid is to continue doing the same thing over and over again expecting a different outcome. I've pasted a few grades, made a few honor rolls, and shook the president of my university's hand as I walked across the stage. “Naw,” that’s not me. However, when dealing with emotion, love can make the smartest person look stupid. In the past I would have responded and we would have sent texts back and forward to each other until we reached the, I still love you phase. Then we start to have the conversation of “we should just start over” I never understand why people say that when a relationship has ended. All that means is another 3 months of the representation then after that, they fall back to being the same person. I guess I just don’t understand it but I don’t think many people will understand why I had to do what I did. I can’t concern myself with what other people think. I just have to do what’s best for me. And, what’s best for me is my happiness. I put the phone away and continue to watch the afternoon Sportscenter. I’m not going to respond this time. It's time for a new day.
Right now I can't respond. I don't want to fall back into the same routine. I read it again. I’m starting to doubt my decisions. Maybe this time the light will go on...maybe this time she will fully commit. She just needs to know how much I love her. She needs to know that I can be that rock she can lean on through good and bad times. Wait, she has had two years to realize what we can be. Someone once said that the definition of stupid is to continue doing the same thing over and over again expecting a different outcome. I've pasted a few grades, made a few honor rolls, and shook the president of my university's hand as I walked across the stage. “Naw,” that’s not me. However, when dealing with emotion, love can make the smartest person look stupid. In the past I would have responded and we would have sent texts back and forward to each other until we reached the, I still love you phase. Then we start to have the conversation of “we should just start over” I never understand why people say that when a relationship has ended. All that means is another 3 months of the representation then after that, they fall back to being the same person. I guess I just don’t understand it but I don’t think many people will understand why I had to do what I did. I can’t concern myself with what other people think. I just have to do what’s best for me. And, what’s best for me is my happiness. I put the phone away and continue to watch the afternoon Sportscenter. I’m not going to respond this time. It's time for a new day.
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